I have to Number my thoughts

#1 The Mormons that were here helping Helena to write the standards for orphanages took us to the La Palm Royal Hotel (one of the fanciest hotels in Ghana) for dinner on Friday night. When you are sitting at the outside restaurant next to the ocean and the night-lit pool, it is easy to forget that you are in Ghana. I was having flashbacks to when my parents came to see me two years ago and how difficult it was to try and juggle the luxury vs. poverty. But it was a nice break; I had a good full meal and got to enjoy an outdoor band next to the ocean for a few hours.

#2 I wish my nails didn’t grow here...it is a hassle to have to clip them

#3 I have started to figure out that my irrationality of being in Ghana takes over when I don’t have enough food in my stomach. I have seen a direct connection to my homesickness and my food intake. I haven’t been getting as much food as my body probably needs. Hopefully this will change once I am living on my own…speaking of which:

#4 I should be moving into the orphanage tonight! I still have my doubts because it is Ghana but I packed up all my things from Helena’s and brought them all with me. I am going to miss the company of having a family around when I get home from work but that will be replaced with the kids at the home, the boys from cantonments, reading, and hopefully new volunteer friends now that I am closer.

#5 This weekend was really laid back. I went to the home Sat. morning, then I went to see my old host family from when I was here in May, and then I went and watched a couple football matches at Cantonments. Those football boys continue to keep me sane. On Sunday I just stayed out in Adenta and visited the boys at the foster home and then we all went back to Helena’s to watch Ghana in the final match of the African Cup of Nations. Sadly, Egypt won…the mood in Ghana was very blue last night.

#6 Things with my work are good but I have my moments where I think I can’t handle all of it. Helena is in the process of making me a director of her NGO, All Hands on Deck for Africa, so that I can be more involved and then get it registered in the US to be able to apply for grants. I am really excited about this but at the same time I am torn. Right now it is important for my project to be able to get grants to continue, but my long-term plan is the desire to have a for-profit organization so that it remains sustainable and does not depend on the generosity of others. So I am struggling with the fact that now I am trying to get this registered as a non-profit. But at the same time I need to do what is best for the boys at this point in time.

#7 Kwabena Nimeche is no longer going to be a part of this project. This is the boy who is the youngest in the home and the brother of the oldest, Kwame Mensah. There has been a lot of thought put into this decision but at this point in time it is the best thing for him and the project. Kwame Mensah has been able to find a very good job in Ghana and so within the next year will be moving out of the group home to live on his own and since the point was to keep them together, Kwabena Nimeche would have to go with him. But Kwame Mensah will not be able to support him on his own and our project can’t at this time fund Kwabena while he is not living in the home. In addition, he has shown a lack of interest in the project and a desire to stay at Osu Children’s Home. Our project is not strong enough to work with kids who are not willing to participate. It makes me sad but at the same time I know that Osu Children’s Home will continue to care for him. And for those of you who are confused; the woman that we were originally trying to save them from was fired and our project has evolved with a new purpose. I will try and expand on this more later. There will be a new boy moving in to replace Kwabena and Helena and I will be discussing that over the next few weeks.

#8 The importance of this project is shown to me more and more every day. Helena and I had a long discussion about armed robbers the other night and their increasing presence in Ghana. These robbers break into houses and steal things and kill the residents. A pastor who was a close friend of Helena’s daughter was a victim of one of these robberies just last month. Helena was telling me that it is these kids in orphanages who have never been shown love that turn into these robbers. They have no concept of love and don’t care about anyone but themselves, they simply believe in survival of the fittest. She told me how the kids that were brought to the home later in life have a better chance of making it out ok but it is the children that have been there since they were toddlers that then have troubles after. It breaks my heart to think of Aquilly, Akwoko, Raymond, and Efia…my 4 toddlers who are still at the home...what does life have in store for them? But even after I have said this about the armed robbery I have to believe I am safe. I have been reading Psalm 91 multiple times a day hoping it applies to me. Yes, there are times when I am scared but I am careful and smart about the way I live here. So I will continue to pray without ceasing.

#9 I wish I was an excel expert…

#10 Sometimes I forget that I am the one making decisions. I have been writing down all of these questions/decisions that need to be answered/made and then I remember… these are all things I need to sit down, think about, and decide.