So I got sick on Friday night. I had a fever, a headache, and the shakes. I just felt like crap in general. I haven't been properly sick since I have been here and let me tell you I would prefer if it didn't happen again. I don't have a roommate and I certainly don't have my mom here. Going to sleep on Friday night knowing that I was sick was difficult. Luckily on Sat. morning I had one of my friends take care of me. He called me as soon as he woke up at 7 and told me that I needed to get up and go wait outside because he was going to come and pick me up in a cab to take me to the hospital. I spent 5 hours on Saturday getting tested for malaria. My friend sat with me the entire 5 hours we had to wait and then made sure I got both of my meals that day. Turns out I don't have malaria just an infection of some sort and so they gave me antibiotics and I have to go back on Wed. to pick up some test results. I am not feeling 100% but I am doing a lot better. I am so thankful that it wasn't malaria and thankful that I have such good friends here that they are watching out for me when I don't have parents to do that.
This past week has been hard and I think that is part of the reason I got sick. I need everyone back home to know that I am not staying longer cause I am running away from things back home but I am doing this because I think it is the right thing for me and the kids. Trust me, it is hard to be here sometimes. Knowing that I was supposed to be home by now is difficult when I hear stories about things going on at home. I miss home and I miss real showers and healthy food and not having to wear mosquito repellent everywhere I go. I am pressing on and the kids make it a lot easier on me. They can read me and they can tell when I am having a hard time. Having said all of this I do not regret my decision in staying. I am positive that this is where I should be even when I just want to be home.
I walked out of my guest house the other day and at the same time Edward (one of the older boys) was leaving the house and tears were just streaming down his face. He tried to cover up his tears by telling me that he had just woken up. He is 16 and is the smartest boy (as far as I can tell) at the home and shows the most potential. His parents abandoned him 10 years ago and he said that sometimes he just has this feeling of emptiness. That sometimes there is a sadness that comes over him that is so strong he can't push it away--no matter how hard he tries. He wants to become a lawyer and from there go into politics and change Ghana. He studies more than any of the boys and is so articulate. I am going to the U.S. Embassy to pick up a practice ACT book for him. He wants to go to University in America and I believe that he has the ability. I get so angry sometimes because I don't have the slightest idea how someone could abandon their child. I know that I don't know the story and maybe it was for the best but it breaks my heart to see Edward struggle with something like that; to think that he isn't good enough because his parents left him. It takes everything within me not to scream and kick holes through walls. I want to see him succeed and I know that he will, I wish his parents could see that too.
I have also made an executive decision that if you stuck a bunch of Ghanaian babies and a bunch of American babies in a room together with small objects the American babies would choke first. I have sat here for the past 3 months watching these kids shove stones, coins and beads into their mouth and not once have they choked. Maybe they are just lucky but somehow I think they might just be a little bit smarter. Survival of the fittest.
I am going to go now but I hope that you all know that I miss you guys back home and I will be so happy to see you.
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